A recurring mantra is never say never.
My Mom was never going to a long term care facility (okay, a nursing home, I said it) until she did, one year ago today. It was one of the most difficult decisions I ever made, but one of the best as it turns out. She is thriving.
My Son was never going to a catholic school until it was clear that one school in particular was a good fit for him. Now we are planning for next year.
I was never going to work regularly in an office again until it became clear that doing so would allow me to work smarter. I hired someone, and training her in the office was most effective. Also, I can time-block my days better by regularly going to the office. Don't get me wrong, this office work is not 5 days a week, but it is much more than I ever thought I would want.
Allowing life to take its natural course is a favorable approach. Follow the possibilities rather than fighting them.
Showing posts with label #nursingHome. Show all posts
Showing posts with label #nursingHome. Show all posts
Tuesday, April 7, 2015
Tuesday, October 7, 2014
Time passes ....
Six months ago this morning, my Mom left her senior living community to transition to long-term care. The events leading up to that day were some of the most difficult ones with which I have had to deal.
That day was very surreal. We didn't actually tell my Mom she was moving because it was easier to leave the details vague. My mom has a dementia diagnosis, though she is rather cognizant. We entered this phase not knowing if it in fact would be permanent. We told my Mom that this was something else that we were going to try to see if she could get stronger after a recent fall left her needing 24-hour care.
My Mom's transition to log-term care, okay, to a nursing home (yes, I said it), has been remarkably smooth, and for that I am grateful. She has settled in quite nicely. She is well cared for and safe. I am able to visit, end enjoy quality time, with her, which were increasingly less frequent when she was living independently.
More often than not, I indicate generally that my Mom has transitioned to long-term care. This approach results in less comments and criticism than when I say that my Mom is in a nursing home.
Caring for my 94 year-old Mom has been a challenge, particularly while: maintaining full-time professional employment; raising a gregarious 10 year-old; nurturing my marriage; and trying to stay healthy and fit while my 50 year-old body wants only to expand.
We often hear about eldercare issues, but not always in a positive way. I think that should change. Everyone's situation is different. Individuals' situations change over time. We need to be open to possibilities. There should be more supporting, and less judging.
I never thought my Mom would live in a nursing home. Quite frankly, I also never thought she would be alive at 94 years old, though I also never envisioned her death. Did I think she was going to live forever and never age? No. I guess I simply never thought too much about my Mom's mortality. But, like with so many other things I have been forced to think about, I am managing.
That day was very surreal. We didn't actually tell my Mom she was moving because it was easier to leave the details vague. My mom has a dementia diagnosis, though she is rather cognizant. We entered this phase not knowing if it in fact would be permanent. We told my Mom that this was something else that we were going to try to see if she could get stronger after a recent fall left her needing 24-hour care.
My Mom's transition to log-term care, okay, to a nursing home (yes, I said it), has been remarkably smooth, and for that I am grateful. She has settled in quite nicely. She is well cared for and safe. I am able to visit, end enjoy quality time, with her, which were increasingly less frequent when she was living independently.
More often than not, I indicate generally that my Mom has transitioned to long-term care. This approach results in less comments and criticism than when I say that my Mom is in a nursing home.
Caring for my 94 year-old Mom has been a challenge, particularly while: maintaining full-time professional employment; raising a gregarious 10 year-old; nurturing my marriage; and trying to stay healthy and fit while my 50 year-old body wants only to expand.
We often hear about eldercare issues, but not always in a positive way. I think that should change. Everyone's situation is different. Individuals' situations change over time. We need to be open to possibilities. There should be more supporting, and less judging.
I never thought my Mom would live in a nursing home. Quite frankly, I also never thought she would be alive at 94 years old, though I also never envisioned her death. Did I think she was going to live forever and never age? No. I guess I simply never thought too much about my Mom's mortality. But, like with so many other things I have been forced to think about, I am managing.
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