Today was a rest day with no running. Though my body wasn't running, my emotions certainly were. It's all good, but a lot to absorb. I still had way too much to do with work and family, so the actual total resting didn't much happen.
This moment, however, is to be appreciated. I am sitting on the couch with my dog. I am watching the Food Network. I am blogging on my laptop, while listening to songs on iTunes that I just downloaded from Starbucks song of the week cards. I have my feet up. I'm sipping my new comfort drink of vanilla chai latte that I discovered through Amazon. This works for me....
Tomorrow the fun starts with an easy 3 mile run, and getting my things collected. Then I'm off to the race events. If I thought today's emotions were a bit overwhelming, then I can only imagine what tomorrow will bring.
Friday, June 25, 2010
Thursday, June 24, 2010
3 days until the thrill - mind murmurs
As scheduled, I ran 8 miles tonight. It was too tough. I am glad that I did it, but it took a bit out of me.
Now it's time to rest. I have an easy 3 scheduled for Saturday, but nothing else until the race.
I am ready for this culmination. The whole weekend will be amazing. I will enjoy every minute of it.
The details are many, but I am ready for them.
My right now is here, and I am prepared to make it mine for all that it's worth, which is so much!
Now it's time to rest. I have an easy 3 scheduled for Saturday, but nothing else until the race.
I am ready for this culmination. The whole weekend will be amazing. I will enjoy every minute of it.
The details are many, but I am ready for them.
My right now is here, and I am prepared to make it mine for all that it's worth, which is so much!
Wednesday, June 23, 2010
4 days to fulfillment -- daily dose of mind murmurs
Today was tough. However, I will focus on the positive, and not the negative. During this last week, molding the mind is critical. Getting into the get it done mode is all that matters.
Reading the race weekend details brought tears to my eyes, though I am not completely sure why. Quite simply, this is awesome in so many ways.
I was scheduled for strength training, and to run 5 miles. However, I was so tired and full of aches all day. Neither session happened. Finally, I decided to forego the weights. The run had to happen and did -- at about 8:00 this evening. After a slow start, I got into my groove. I finished fast and strong. The first mile was over 10 minutes, and the last mile was about nine minutes. In all, I ran at about a 9:43/mile pace. Most importantly, I actually feel better now than before I ran. What's up with that?
My 1/2 marathon will be monumental, though I probably will not break 2 hours as I had hoped. It doesn't matter -- crossing the finish line will be my sweet success! Enjoying the entire experience is extremely essential, and I am ready for that!
Reading the race weekend details brought tears to my eyes, though I am not completely sure why. Quite simply, this is awesome in so many ways.
I was scheduled for strength training, and to run 5 miles. However, I was so tired and full of aches all day. Neither session happened. Finally, I decided to forego the weights. The run had to happen and did -- at about 8:00 this evening. After a slow start, I got into my groove. I finished fast and strong. The first mile was over 10 minutes, and the last mile was about nine minutes. In all, I ran at about a 9:43/mile pace. Most importantly, I actually feel better now than before I ran. What's up with that?
My 1/2 marathon will be monumental, though I probably will not break 2 hours as I had hoped. It doesn't matter -- crossing the finish line will be my sweet success! Enjoying the entire experience is extremely essential, and I am ready for that!
Tuesday, June 22, 2010
5 days to fabulous
Today was a rest day, which was welcomed. I began it with some aches from the past few days, and I am ending it with less aches and ready to run again tomorrow.
I am very busy with other than my remaking, but I need to relish this. I have worked hard to arrive at this location. I need to get things done for work and for my family, but I must focus on me so that the final lap of this adventure is as rewarding as the journey has been.
I am very busy with other than my remaking, but I need to relish this. I have worked hard to arrive at this location. I need to get things done for work and for my family, but I must focus on me so that the final lap of this adventure is as rewarding as the journey has been.
Monday, June 21, 2010
6 days to success -- mind murmurs
Less than 1 week until I successfully complete my 1/2 marathon. Based on my training, I know that I will succeed.
Today, I got through my strength training and my scheduled 3 miles. Both were a bit of a challenge, but the goal of completion was conquered. I ate and drank rather well. Sleep will not yet fully be mine because there's still much else to do. It's okay, though.
Currently, I am feeling fine. I am fortunate to find myself here.
Today, I got through my strength training and my scheduled 3 miles. Both were a bit of a challenge, but the goal of completion was conquered. I ate and drank rather well. Sleep will not yet fully be mine because there's still much else to do. It's okay, though.
Currently, I am feeling fine. I am fortunate to find myself here.
Sunday, June 20, 2010
7 days and counting....
I ran 3 miles today during the heat of the day, with an average of approximately 9:40/mile. I felt great, and had fun! I did not eat or drink properly today, but I have time to make up for that.
Tomorrow is the first day of the last week of my training and remaking. My energy is so positive. I am not concerned at all about getting to race day. I have properly prepared, and I am ready to realize the rewards.
I have so much to do, and am a bit concerned about fitting everything in. All I have learned to date in this remaking will stay with me. I will succeed.
Tomorrow is the first day of the last week of my training and remaking. My energy is so positive. I am not concerned at all about getting to race day. I have properly prepared, and I am ready to realize the rewards.
I have so much to do, and am a bit concerned about fitting everything in. All I have learned to date in this remaking will stay with me. I will succeed.
Saturday, June 19, 2010
Sharing
With my race just 8 days away, it's time to share this Blog by adding a link to Facebook. The final lap of this journey will present itself to me and to others if they decide to join me....
8 more days - mind murmurs
Last team run was today. I am so glad that Jen and I went. The run itself was awesome. It was in South Boston along Carson Beach and then around Castle Island. My life list included a run around Castle Island, so this was perfect. I was scheduled to run 8 miles, and the team said that we were going to run about 6 miles. I have to think that I ended up running somewhere in between, which was just fine. The weather was great, though rather hot.
Being with the team was terrific. It is a diverse group brought together by one cause, to find a cure. So many people are so interesting.
After the run, I got my race shirt. The team spirit, inspiration, and emotion were huge. Knowing that so many people there deal each day with Crohn's and colitis was a bit overwhelming for me. Knowing a bit more about what these courageous people deal with puts my issues into perspective. I must each day recognize and appreciate how fortunate I am.
Tonight I am tired, and a bit drained, which is just fine given the source of my depletion.
Being with the team was terrific. It is a diverse group brought together by one cause, to find a cure. So many people are so interesting.
After the run, I got my race shirt. The team spirit, inspiration, and emotion were huge. Knowing that so many people there deal each day with Crohn's and colitis was a bit overwhelming for me. Knowing a bit more about what these courageous people deal with puts my issues into perspective. I must each day recognize and appreciate how fortunate I am.
Tonight I am tired, and a bit drained, which is just fine given the source of my depletion.
Friday, June 18, 2010
9 days remaining -- Race Day Countdown
It's single-digit countdown. My race is 9 days away. Daily doses of mind murmurs through race day will record this awesome time, and will provide a coherent continuum.
Race day will be the culmination of this Remaking which has progressed perfectly. I feel so much better mentally, emotionally, and physically. I am better able to balance the many aspects of my life. I am in control of my emotions. I am more fit and have more energy. I am making a difference in my life, and in the lives of others. I have learned that I can focus on myself while still providing for others. My thoughts are so abundant and consuming. However, my actions are many and productive. Having both thoughts and actions is critical.
I am blessed to have arrived at this location, and I believe that more marvelous moments are to come. What a ride, or run as here is the case, this will continue to be....
Race day will be the culmination of this Remaking which has progressed perfectly. I feel so much better mentally, emotionally, and physically. I am better able to balance the many aspects of my life. I am in control of my emotions. I am more fit and have more energy. I am making a difference in my life, and in the lives of others. I have learned that I can focus on myself while still providing for others. My thoughts are so abundant and consuming. However, my actions are many and productive. Having both thoughts and actions is critical.
I am blessed to have arrived at this location, and I believe that more marvelous moments are to come. What a ride, or run as here is the case, this will continue to be....
Saturday, June 12, 2010
Voided Vice
In January, I wrote about vice voiding. Today, I write about the voiced vice -- it's been 1 year since I smoked my last cigarette. I do so miss this vice, and often think about having a cigarette. Once, I even had a dream (actually a nightmare) that I smoked a cigarette. Often, I think about words of dear Cousin Tricia. Paraphrasing, I recall that after she quit, she told me that she could not have even one because it would lead to more. I thought that was a silly statement until this past year. I know that if I had even one cigarette then the vice would still be mine. I don't want that vice, and, therefore, I refrain from even one puff.
No doubt, I will write more about this vice. For now, I have to go live my life as a mother because it's Saturday and my Son has baseball and a birthday party. Also, I need to run 12 miles because my 1/2 marathon is 2 weeks from tomorrow.
No doubt, I will write more about this vice. For now, I have to go live my life as a mother because it's Saturday and my Son has baseball and a birthday party. Also, I need to run 12 miles because my 1/2 marathon is 2 weeks from tomorrow.
Saturday, June 5, 2010
Tough Training
Again, it's been too long since my last post. My mind murmurs, weekly wanderings, and monthly monitor have to wait. Included in this remaking is learning to focus on what matters at the moment. I am doing well in that regard. The past month has been a time of adjusting. For the first time is a long time, my work required a great deal of my attention. It was difficult, but so worth it.
I now am back to a better balance. Training has been tough, but it's almost over -- my race is three weeks from tomorrow. I am back to my scheduled miles. Over the past few weeks, I have been better about fitting in my strength training - still not 100% as scheduled, but better than before. I will take credit for that increase. Last week, I fit in a 10 mile run before 8:00 in the morning. It was absolutely awesome!
Today I ran my first long run with Team Challenge. I was scheduled to run 6 today, and 4 tomorrow. However, the Team was running 10.5 miles. I wanted to participate because the race is near, and because the course was part of the race route. The run was one of my hardest, almost ever. It was hot and hilly. Now it is done, though, and my sense of accomplishment is sensational.
I now am back to a better balance. Training has been tough, but it's almost over -- my race is three weeks from tomorrow. I am back to my scheduled miles. Over the past few weeks, I have been better about fitting in my strength training - still not 100% as scheduled, but better than before. I will take credit for that increase. Last week, I fit in a 10 mile run before 8:00 in the morning. It was absolutely awesome!
Today I ran my first long run with Team Challenge. I was scheduled to run 6 today, and 4 tomorrow. However, the Team was running 10.5 miles. I wanted to participate because the race is near, and because the course was part of the race route. The run was one of my hardest, almost ever. It was hot and hilly. Now it is done, though, and my sense of accomplishment is sensational.
Thursday, May 27, 2010
Life gets in the way
It's been too long since I posted. I have been way too busy with work. The hours have been endless. Some days, almost every woken moment has been dedicated to work. The lesson is that I can adjust. I am trying to balance what needs to get done for work and what needs to get done for me and my Son. Everything else, well....
One month from today, I will be running my 1/2 marathon. My training mostly has been on track. I missed a few runs when work was at its worst. I think that I will be okay. I am trying yet again to fit in a specific strength session with weights.
The craziness that has been my life lately actually is good for my remaking. I am learning a lot about balancing my wants and needs. I feel fortunate to have too much work, and am determined to keep it as a priority. I will fit in what matters to and for me.
One month from today, I will be running my 1/2 marathon. My training mostly has been on track. I missed a few runs when work was at its worst. I think that I will be okay. I am trying yet again to fit in a specific strength session with weights.
The craziness that has been my life lately actually is good for my remaking. I am learning a lot about balancing my wants and needs. I feel fortunate to have too much work, and am determined to keep it as a priority. I will fit in what matters to and for me.
Sunday, May 9, 2010
Weekly wanderings
Mother's day almost is over. The best part was simply being able to celebrate it with my Son.
Training this week was tough. I felt like I was only putting in the time and miles. I was plugging along, and then it was Saturday. I agreed to run a 5K race that was a neighbor's fundraiser. It was raining out. I didn't need to run another 5K -- it's not an ideal distance for me -- but it promised to be fun, most significantly because it was in my neighborhood. Needless to say, it was a blast with friends and family. Most importantly, my husband and son cheered me on. Despite running in the rain, I was so fast for me. I took just over 1 minute off my March 5K time. I finished in 27:31, with an 8:52/mile pace. What a terrific time! Completing the event was my son's fun run. He did well, and enjoyed himself.
I would not trade my time this past week, but I now am a bit nervous about all I now have to do, mostly for work. I must go into doing mode, and out of thinking and talking mode. Those two Ts must wait for now, and that's okay. I have progressed so far in my remaking -- I practically am where I want and need to be.
Training this week was tough. I felt like I was only putting in the time and miles. I was plugging along, and then it was Saturday. I agreed to run a 5K race that was a neighbor's fundraiser. It was raining out. I didn't need to run another 5K -- it's not an ideal distance for me -- but it promised to be fun, most significantly because it was in my neighborhood. Needless to say, it was a blast with friends and family. Most importantly, my husband and son cheered me on. Despite running in the rain, I was so fast for me. I took just over 1 minute off my March 5K time. I finished in 27:31, with an 8:52/mile pace. What a terrific time! Completing the event was my son's fun run. He did well, and enjoyed himself.
I would not trade my time this past week, but I now am a bit nervous about all I now have to do, mostly for work. I must go into doing mode, and out of thinking and talking mode. Those two Ts must wait for now, and that's okay. I have progressed so far in my remaking -- I practically am where I want and need to be.
Tuesday, May 4, 2010
Helen's happenings -- running and raising money update
Tonight, I sent out the following update:
This adventure is progressing perfectly!
On the running front, I am getting stronger and faster. On April 25th, I had a fabulous finish in my training 10K race. I ran the 6.2 miles in 58:33, or a 9:26/mile pace.
On the raising money front, I have received 56 donations for a total of $2,443.00, exceeding my goal.
Knowing that I have your support provides additional motivation for my training. We are making a difference in the fight for a Crohn’s cure.
The big event, my ½ marathon, is less than 8 weeks away, on June 27th. Until then, I will continue my training, increasing my distance, speed, and strength. The link for more race information, including the route, is: http://www.131marathon.com
After the race, I will send out another update. If you want more information before then, please let me know.
Thanks again for your support, which I so appreciate!
With gratitude, Helen/Betsy
This adventure is progressing perfectly!
On the running front, I am getting stronger and faster. On April 25th, I had a fabulous finish in my training 10K race. I ran the 6.2 miles in 58:33, or a 9:26/mile pace.
On the raising money front, I have received 56 donations for a total of $2,443.00, exceeding my goal.
Knowing that I have your support provides additional motivation for my training. We are making a difference in the fight for a Crohn’s cure.
The big event, my ½ marathon, is less than 8 weeks away, on June 27th. Until then, I will continue my training, increasing my distance, speed, and strength. The link for more race information, including the route, is: http://www.131marathon.com
After the race, I will send out another update. If you want more information before then, please let me know.
Thanks again for your support, which I so appreciate!
With gratitude, Helen/Betsy
Monday, May 3, 2010
May 3 -- Memorable moment
Quite by chance, the family walked to the bus stop together -- Mommy, Daddy, doggy, and Son. On the way, my son and I held hands as we often do. He reached out for his father's hand, and commented with a big smile on his face that everyone was holding hands because "Daddy had Hunter." My Son took these few minutes in stride, but to me they were huge. I am thankful that this moment happened, and that I am able to acknowledge and appreciate it.
Sunday, May 2, 2010
Weekly wanderings
This week was full of doing, primarily concerning working, running, cooking, and mothering. At times, doing, rather than thinking and analyzing, is a necessary survival tool. This was one of those times.
Work was extra busy, partially because it was the end of the month, and partially because of my current workload. I got lots done, but there's so much more to do. It's all good, though.
Running was tough this week, I am hoping because of my terrific 10K. I was rather slow early in the week. I just kept going, and the end of the week was much better. On Saturday, I planted a bottle for the first time during this 1/2 marathon training. This added training technique fit into my 8 mile long run with ease.
Cooking was a challenge because of everything else that had to get done, and because of my son's little league games that are scheduled during dinner time. Creativity and planning ahead helped to successfully conquer this challenge.
Mothering this week was comprised primarily of having quality time with my son. I had to make time to: drive him to school when he missed the bus; watch his little league games; help him with his homework; and respond patiently to his many questions.
Realizing that I can't do it all includes accepting that my house and yard will not be as done and as otherwise desired. The house and yard currently fall into the category of simply doing what needs to be done, and not much more.
On Saturday, I had a realization about priorities, and how they change. This realization presented itself quite by accident. My son went to the circus. I went with my husband to pick up the number for his 5K race on Sunday. This date included a walk through the mall. In the past, mall trips would require time at Crate & Barrel, Restoration Hardware, and Talbots. Also, I rarely go into a store without purchasing something. On this trip to the mall, I passed these favorite stores, realizing that I don't need the items inside. What they offer is not required for this remaking. What I have in the homeware and clothing categories currently is sufficient. I will work right now with what I have. Acceptance of this realization was huge and greatly gratifying.
Work was extra busy, partially because it was the end of the month, and partially because of my current workload. I got lots done, but there's so much more to do. It's all good, though.
Running was tough this week, I am hoping because of my terrific 10K. I was rather slow early in the week. I just kept going, and the end of the week was much better. On Saturday, I planted a bottle for the first time during this 1/2 marathon training. This added training technique fit into my 8 mile long run with ease.
Cooking was a challenge because of everything else that had to get done, and because of my son's little league games that are scheduled during dinner time. Creativity and planning ahead helped to successfully conquer this challenge.
Mothering this week was comprised primarily of having quality time with my son. I had to make time to: drive him to school when he missed the bus; watch his little league games; help him with his homework; and respond patiently to his many questions.
Realizing that I can't do it all includes accepting that my house and yard will not be as done and as otherwise desired. The house and yard currently fall into the category of simply doing what needs to be done, and not much more.
On Saturday, I had a realization about priorities, and how they change. This realization presented itself quite by accident. My son went to the circus. I went with my husband to pick up the number for his 5K race on Sunday. This date included a walk through the mall. In the past, mall trips would require time at Crate & Barrel, Restoration Hardware, and Talbots. Also, I rarely go into a store without purchasing something. On this trip to the mall, I passed these favorite stores, realizing that I don't need the items inside. What they offer is not required for this remaking. What I have in the homeware and clothing categories currently is sufficient. I will work right now with what I have. Acceptance of this realization was huge and greatly gratifying.
Thursday, April 29, 2010
April 29 -- daily dose of mind murmurs
I finished listening to The Big Short after only 3 days, and I feel much more informed. My goal to learn at least 1 thing each day was so met. The book was interesting and intriguing.
For now, I will go back to my podcasts while I decide on the next audiobook that will become part of me. Also, I would like to finally finish reading Meg Whitman's The Power of Many. It's pretty light, and, therefore, rather easy reading.
On the training front, my schedule called for rest. I wanted to strength train, but descided that I needed the rest. Tonight, my aches and pains are less and I feel ready for my busy day tomorrow, which will inlcude a speed session.
For now, I will go back to my podcasts while I decide on the next audiobook that will become part of me. Also, I would like to finally finish reading Meg Whitman's The Power of Many. It's pretty light, and, therefore, rather easy reading.
On the training front, my schedule called for rest. I wanted to strength train, but descided that I needed the rest. Tonight, my aches and pains are less and I feel ready for my busy day tomorrow, which will inlcude a speed session.
Wednesday, April 28, 2010
4/28 -- Daily dose of mind murmurs
The strength I have gained thus far during this remaking got me through today. I made a plan last night, but was unable to work it right from the start when my son missed his bus and I had to drive him to school.
Strength training did not happen, but my hills session did. I was exhausted, but knew that I needed the scheduled 6 miles. They weren't easy, particularly when the incline was added for the hills portion. However, I stayed strong and did my best. Success was my reward. The session certainly wasn't as good as last week's, but that's okay.
I am dealing with the details so much better than before this remaking began. I am able to give myself credit as it is due.
Tonight, I am less tired than I was earlier today. Since completing my run, I have been reenergized. Overall, work went well, as did the evening with my family. Now, it's time for more work, and that's okay.
Another positive part of today was my audiobook fun. My walk with the dog and through the grocery store inlcuded The Big Short. Listening to this Michael Lewis book, rather than reading it, was a good decision for me. I am intrigued, and learning so much. This man is motivating. I know that I would have had a hard time right now getting through the print version, but I almost am done with the audio version. I will get through 2 of Lewis' books in less than 1 week simply by listening rather than reading. How cool is that?
Strength training did not happen, but my hills session did. I was exhausted, but knew that I needed the scheduled 6 miles. They weren't easy, particularly when the incline was added for the hills portion. However, I stayed strong and did my best. Success was my reward. The session certainly wasn't as good as last week's, but that's okay.
I am dealing with the details so much better than before this remaking began. I am able to give myself credit as it is due.
Tonight, I am less tired than I was earlier today. Since completing my run, I have been reenergized. Overall, work went well, as did the evening with my family. Now, it's time for more work, and that's okay.
Another positive part of today was my audiobook fun. My walk with the dog and through the grocery store inlcuded The Big Short. Listening to this Michael Lewis book, rather than reading it, was a good decision for me. I am intrigued, and learning so much. This man is motivating. I know that I would have had a hard time right now getting through the print version, but I almost am done with the audio version. I will get through 2 of Lewis' books in less than 1 week simply by listening rather than reading. How cool is that?
Monday, April 26, 2010
April 26 -- Daily dose of mind murmurs
According to schedule, I did not run today. I actually missed it, though I took the opportunity to strength train. I have not been following that portion of my schedule. My focus needs to find its way there. I read recently that strength is the key to a 1/2 marathon, core strength specifically. This portion of my training must be more of a priority.
My current Apple/iTunes/Amazon fun is with audiobooks. I have been reading, but the time for that is too little. I also have been thinking about an eReader. To try that, I got Kindle for PCs. I got Jenny Sanford's book, but have not gotten very far. It seems that I already am on the computer so much with work, and I need a break. I have been doing the podcast thing with such satisfying success and fabulous fun.
During the past few months, I listened to 2 books on CD (one that I received as a birthday gift and one that I checked out from the library) during my long commute to the office. I enjoyed them.
Presently, I am interested in Michael Lewis' books. I am hearing/reading so much about his new book, and I finally watched The Blind Side movie. I can't imagine how I would find the time right now to read one of his books. However, perhaps I could listen. As a test, I started with Liar's Poker. I enjoyed it tremendously for so many reasons that I will not now take the time to list. Suffice it to say that I just downloaded The Big Short. Can't wait for my commute tomorrow to start listening.
My current Apple/iTunes/Amazon fun is with audiobooks. I have been reading, but the time for that is too little. I also have been thinking about an eReader. To try that, I got Kindle for PCs. I got Jenny Sanford's book, but have not gotten very far. It seems that I already am on the computer so much with work, and I need a break. I have been doing the podcast thing with such satisfying success and fabulous fun.
During the past few months, I listened to 2 books on CD (one that I received as a birthday gift and one that I checked out from the library) during my long commute to the office. I enjoyed them.
Presently, I am interested in Michael Lewis' books. I am hearing/reading so much about his new book, and I finally watched The Blind Side movie. I can't imagine how I would find the time right now to read one of his books. However, perhaps I could listen. As a test, I started with Liar's Poker. I enjoyed it tremendously for so many reasons that I will not now take the time to list. Suffice it to say that I just downloaded The Big Short. Can't wait for my commute tomorrow to start listening.
Sunday, April 25, 2010
Weekly wanderings
I sit here full of myself, at least for today, because I fabulously finished the 10K James Joyce Ramble race. I stayed so strong, crossing the finish line after only 58:33 minutes, with a 9:26/mile pace. I am proud of that finish.
My pride is based on so much. My finish is evidence that my training is working. I am getting faster and stronger. Last year, I ran the same race with a pace of 11:15/mile, and a time of 1:09:43. Last year's weather was so much different -- hot as can be. However, I know that I was stronger today.
This race was the completion of a terrific training week, with a toal of 24.2 miles. I completed the hills and speed sessions so strongly. I trained at about a 10 minute pace.
My son was on vacation this week, and I had so much work to do. I tried to make his vacation special, but with only limited success.
Setting priorities, focusing on right now, as well as benefits and burdens balancing helped me through this challenging and busy week.
I now am exhausted. I am drained. I was defeated somewhat this week, but I will focus on my successes.
My pride is based on so much. My finish is evidence that my training is working. I am getting faster and stronger. Last year, I ran the same race with a pace of 11:15/mile, and a time of 1:09:43. Last year's weather was so much different -- hot as can be. However, I know that I was stronger today.
This race was the completion of a terrific training week, with a toal of 24.2 miles. I completed the hills and speed sessions so strongly. I trained at about a 10 minute pace.
My son was on vacation this week, and I had so much work to do. I tried to make his vacation special, but with only limited success.
Setting priorities, focusing on right now, as well as benefits and burdens balancing helped me through this challenging and busy week.
I now am exhausted. I am drained. I was defeated somewhat this week, but I will focus on my successes.
Friday, April 23, 2010
April 23 - daily dose of mind murmurs
Getting ready to run the 2010 James Joyce Ramble 10K race, about which I am so excited! Preparing includes brushing up on the author's works. Doubliners is most familiar to me. I also can't help but harken back to the following Joyce words:
I am tomorrow, or some future day, what I establish today. I am today what I established yesterday or some previous day.
How true are those words? Presently, they are quite relevant in that I am anxious to beat my 2009 Ramble time of 1:09:54, and to see where I now stand vis-a-vis my 1/2 marathon that now is just over 9 weeks away. Those words also fit nicely into my remaking.
Those words remind me that every day counts, and is critical to who I was, am, and will be. Yesterday's, today's, and tomorrow's runs matter.
I am tomorrow, or some future day, what I establish today. I am today what I established yesterday or some previous day.
How true are those words? Presently, they are quite relevant in that I am anxious to beat my 2009 Ramble time of 1:09:54, and to see where I now stand vis-a-vis my 1/2 marathon that now is just over 9 weeks away. Those words also fit nicely into my remaking.
Those words remind me that every day counts, and is critical to who I was, am, and will be. Yesterday's, today's, and tomorrow's runs matter.
Thursday, April 22, 2010
April 22 - daily dose of mind murmurs
Today we had a terrible thunderstorm, and lost power for about an hour. No power, no work, oh no.
This evening, the storm transformed to reveal a double rainbow, which was so cool. My son and I ran outside to appreciate the awesome site. He ran up and down the street cheering the rainbows. Tonight, he wrote about it in his journal.
Another donation today, putting me at $2,443.00 with 56 supporters. We are making a difference in the fight to find a Crohn's cure. Today's donation came from a dear friend with whom I shared so much. His support means mountains, which I once thought we could move.... His support also shows how important it is to reach out during a fundraising campaign. You never know who will provide support. The results are revealing in so many ways.
This evening, the storm transformed to reveal a double rainbow, which was so cool. My son and I ran outside to appreciate the awesome site. He ran up and down the street cheering the rainbows. Tonight, he wrote about it in his journal.
Another donation today, putting me at $2,443.00 with 56 supporters. We are making a difference in the fight to find a Crohn's cure. Today's donation came from a dear friend with whom I shared so much. His support means mountains, which I once thought we could move.... His support also shows how important it is to reach out during a fundraising campaign. You never know who will provide support. The results are revealing in so many ways.
Sunday, April 18, 2010
Weekly wanderings
This week's hills and speed training sessions were awesome! My running carried me through otherwise hectic days. So much was not as planned, and, therefore, successfully completing my training as planned provided plenty of pleasure.
Saturday's long run was shared with Jen, my Team Challenge partner. Though I typically run alone, it was fun to run the 7 miles with her.
I am over $2,300 in my fundraising, well in excess of my $2,100 goal. I have 53 supporters. Thinking that the raising money portion of this remaking would enhance it was right on. I feel like I am making a difference, and reaching beyond my little piece of this planet.
Getting what I need while giving to and for others is happening! I am practicing my benefits and burdens balancing, and it's working for me.
When I have an action item, I try to look at in in terms of my needs and wants. If the item fits with my needs or wants, I identify, and then balance, the benefits and burdens of moving forward. When the benefits outweigh the burdens, then it's a go. This exercise has been quite helpful of late. After completing it, I feel much more comfortable advancing. I move forward confidently and with no regrets.
Saturday's long run was shared with Jen, my Team Challenge partner. Though I typically run alone, it was fun to run the 7 miles with her.
I am over $2,300 in my fundraising, well in excess of my $2,100 goal. I have 53 supporters. Thinking that the raising money portion of this remaking would enhance it was right on. I feel like I am making a difference, and reaching beyond my little piece of this planet.
Getting what I need while giving to and for others is happening! I am practicing my benefits and burdens balancing, and it's working for me.
When I have an action item, I try to look at in in terms of my needs and wants. If the item fits with my needs or wants, I identify, and then balance, the benefits and burdens of moving forward. When the benefits outweigh the burdens, then it's a go. This exercise has been quite helpful of late. After completing it, I feel much more comfortable advancing. I move forward confidently and with no regrets.
Thursday, April 15, 2010
My Marathon, from 6.2 to 26.2 in 6 months
The Boston Marathon will be run this year on April 19th, the same day on which I ran it in 1999. Thoughts of My Marathon are consuming me again, as they often do. This consumption, however, unlike others in which I take part, is good for me. Memories of My Marathon carry me through tough times, and currently are providing the foundation for my remaking.
Writing about my experience has taken many forms, from the detailed journal I kept during my 6 months of training to the many journal entries since then. Presently, I want to record a few key items, and move on.
The day I completed the 103rd running of the Boston Marathon was among the best in my life. Crossing the finish line with a net time of 4:25:19 represented the culmination of so much hard work and the realization of so many dreams. I was a stronger and more confident version of myself.
I often refer to the book that I will write. It will be entitled: My Marathon, 6.2 miles to 26.2 miles in 6 months. That book, however, will have to wait, like so many other items on my life list. Right now, I will dream more dreams. I also will run and raise money. I want to take a few minutes, however, to recall My Marathon. The mechanics of that remaking is fueling my current remaking.
My Marathon remaking was a 6 month adventure. In 1998, I was running again and trying to figure out what was ahead for me. I had a good life, but I wanted more. Figuring out what that was, however, was difficult. In October, I ran the renowned Tuft’s 10K race in Boston. I ran it with a friend, who I drove home to the north of Boston. Coming over the bridge back to Boston, I decided that I would run the Boston Marathon. I immediately told my Mom, who replied, “I think you’re crazy, but I’ll be there cheering you on.” My Mom’s reaction was not completely unfounded, as I had not run more than 6.2 miles recently, if ever. Knowing that she would be there was based on other of my conquests, including passing the Bar.
Deciding to run Boston was one thing, but actually getting it done was another. I had to get a number, and then figure out how to run 26.2 miles. After researching the many organizations through which I could get a number, I decided on Judge Baker Children’s Center. That organization best fit with my needs. On the running front, I joined a gym, and was partnered with a trainer who helped me realize my dream. The necessary work was difficult, but so rewarding and worthwhile.
My reasons for running Boston were many and varied. Like so many decisions that I made during my life, this decision was based in part on my desire to please others. I was seeing a man who told me, “I like that you run. I like how you feel.” Well, I agreed with that statement. I also thought: I could run more; I could run the Boston Marathon; what would you think then? I never got a chance to find out. Things did not work out with that marvelous man. However, he always will have a piece of my heart. I also vowed that I would not allow my heart to be broken again by a man.
My 6 months of training were filled with many memorable moments, and super successes. Through my fundraising, I drew strength from the support that so many people provided. That support, and my determination, resulted in an uneventfully awesome Boston Marathon!
Though My Marathon was almost 11 years ago, the experience sustains me still.
Writing about my experience has taken many forms, from the detailed journal I kept during my 6 months of training to the many journal entries since then. Presently, I want to record a few key items, and move on.
The day I completed the 103rd running of the Boston Marathon was among the best in my life. Crossing the finish line with a net time of 4:25:19 represented the culmination of so much hard work and the realization of so many dreams. I was a stronger and more confident version of myself.
I often refer to the book that I will write. It will be entitled: My Marathon, 6.2 miles to 26.2 miles in 6 months. That book, however, will have to wait, like so many other items on my life list. Right now, I will dream more dreams. I also will run and raise money. I want to take a few minutes, however, to recall My Marathon. The mechanics of that remaking is fueling my current remaking.
My Marathon remaking was a 6 month adventure. In 1998, I was running again and trying to figure out what was ahead for me. I had a good life, but I wanted more. Figuring out what that was, however, was difficult. In October, I ran the renowned Tuft’s 10K race in Boston. I ran it with a friend, who I drove home to the north of Boston. Coming over the bridge back to Boston, I decided that I would run the Boston Marathon. I immediately told my Mom, who replied, “I think you’re crazy, but I’ll be there cheering you on.” My Mom’s reaction was not completely unfounded, as I had not run more than 6.2 miles recently, if ever. Knowing that she would be there was based on other of my conquests, including passing the Bar.
Deciding to run Boston was one thing, but actually getting it done was another. I had to get a number, and then figure out how to run 26.2 miles. After researching the many organizations through which I could get a number, I decided on Judge Baker Children’s Center. That organization best fit with my needs. On the running front, I joined a gym, and was partnered with a trainer who helped me realize my dream. The necessary work was difficult, but so rewarding and worthwhile.
My reasons for running Boston were many and varied. Like so many decisions that I made during my life, this decision was based in part on my desire to please others. I was seeing a man who told me, “I like that you run. I like how you feel.” Well, I agreed with that statement. I also thought: I could run more; I could run the Boston Marathon; what would you think then? I never got a chance to find out. Things did not work out with that marvelous man. However, he always will have a piece of my heart. I also vowed that I would not allow my heart to be broken again by a man.
My 6 months of training were filled with many memorable moments, and super successes. Through my fundraising, I drew strength from the support that so many people provided. That support, and my determination, resulted in an uneventfully awesome Boston Marathon!
Though My Marathon was almost 11 years ago, the experience sustains me still.
Wednesday, April 14, 2010
Training triumph and torture
In one hour today, the triumph and torture of training were realized.
I fit me in by going to the gym for my scheduled session of hills training. I have been working this session since early February. I have done parts of the session, but I have not been able to complete it as my trainer instructed. I have been making progress, but.... Today, I wasn't certain of my ability to complete the session, particularly because my thighs have been aching. After putting one foot in front of the other for more than one hour and for a total of 6 miles, I successfully completed the session. The hills portion included staying at an even pace, but changing the incline every 2 minutes. The incline ranged from 1 to 7 with everything in between, and then again. During past attempts, I changed the pace, had not gotten to a 7 incline, or did not get to every incremental increase as instructed. Today, I did all of that and more!
The triumph of my successful session was huge! Home I went.
When I walked in the door at home, my son called from the other room, "why are you so late?" It was not late; it was 5:50 in the afternoon. I proceeded to the kitchen, and told my husband about the quick dinner I was going to prepare. With a tone and an attitude, he said, "I can't wait until 7:00 for dinner." I tried to explain myself, and he said, "you got to do what you wanted to do, so what's the problem." This also was said with a tone and an attitude. Classic attacks. These comments were torture. They tainted my triumph. Nonetheless, I prepared my dinner as planned. Part of the reason for the attitudes is that my family is trained to sit down to dinner by 6:00. My triumph did not meet their expections, and they took it out on me.
My son now is in bed, no worse from the trainng torture, as evidenced by the fact that recalling his day at bedtime did not even include my time at the gym, or the different dinner.
I am regrouping, getting ready for the many more things that I must manage to conquer tonight. For this monumental moment, however, I am digesting my acceptance that triumph and torture often come together. Without one, the other is not so intense.
I fit me in by going to the gym for my scheduled session of hills training. I have been working this session since early February. I have done parts of the session, but I have not been able to complete it as my trainer instructed. I have been making progress, but.... Today, I wasn't certain of my ability to complete the session, particularly because my thighs have been aching. After putting one foot in front of the other for more than one hour and for a total of 6 miles, I successfully completed the session. The hills portion included staying at an even pace, but changing the incline every 2 minutes. The incline ranged from 1 to 7 with everything in between, and then again. During past attempts, I changed the pace, had not gotten to a 7 incline, or did not get to every incremental increase as instructed. Today, I did all of that and more!
The triumph of my successful session was huge! Home I went.
When I walked in the door at home, my son called from the other room, "why are you so late?" It was not late; it was 5:50 in the afternoon. I proceeded to the kitchen, and told my husband about the quick dinner I was going to prepare. With a tone and an attitude, he said, "I can't wait until 7:00 for dinner." I tried to explain myself, and he said, "you got to do what you wanted to do, so what's the problem." This also was said with a tone and an attitude. Classic attacks. These comments were torture. They tainted my triumph. Nonetheless, I prepared my dinner as planned. Part of the reason for the attitudes is that my family is trained to sit down to dinner by 6:00. My triumph did not meet their expections, and they took it out on me.
My son now is in bed, no worse from the trainng torture, as evidenced by the fact that recalling his day at bedtime did not even include my time at the gym, or the different dinner.
I am regrouping, getting ready for the many more things that I must manage to conquer tonight. For this monumental moment, however, I am digesting my acceptance that triumph and torture often come together. Without one, the other is not so intense.
Daily dose of mind murmurs
Staying power.
So much hinges on the power to stay.
StayQuit -- This has been critical since I decided that I would have my last cigarette ever on Jun 12, 2009.
StayStrong -- This is critical during a difficult run and always during a race.
StayTrue -- This one is new for me as a defined concept during my current remaking. As long as I stay true to myself, then I can cruise confidently through challenges that inevitably invade.
I think that I will work more on just staying....
So much hinges on the power to stay.
StayQuit -- This has been critical since I decided that I would have my last cigarette ever on Jun 12, 2009.
StayStrong -- This is critical during a difficult run and always during a race.
StayTrue -- This one is new for me as a defined concept during my current remaking. As long as I stay true to myself, then I can cruise confidently through challenges that inevitably invade.
I think that I will work more on just staying....
Tuesday, April 13, 2010
Daily dose of mind murmurs
Today, I fit me in. This remaking is progressing perfectly. I ran at the gym on my way home from the office. My family was no worse off, and I was in such a better place because I had taken time for me. It's been a long day, but a productive one! It's not over yet, but that's okay.
I am getting stronger and faster! I feel great! I am taking time for me, and the result is more energy and less stress. I am getting more from doing more.
I am getting stronger and faster! I feel great! I am taking time for me, and the result is more energy and less stress. I am getting more from doing more.
Sunday, April 11, 2010
Daily dose of mind murmers
I had so much to do today, but I knew that I had to spend time with my Son. He started little league this past week and has wanted to practice. I bought a baseball glove this morning in anticipation of my inevitable involvement. I do still have the only glove that I ever owned. However, as I received it probably when I was in the second grade, it is quite small. I also decided that I deserved a new glove.
This afternoon, Connor asked me to play catch with him. I did. I had fun, and we both did a good job. While we were playing, he ran by me to fetch a wild ball. On his way back, without a word, he came over and gave me a huge hug. He then continued on his way. That was a monumental moment. As a Mom, for what more could I ask?
Quite regularly, I remind myself to focus on what I did, rather than on what’s left for me to do. I read recently (not recalling where) that what counts is progress, not perfection.
Remember to marvel at the moments.
This afternoon, Connor asked me to play catch with him. I did. I had fun, and we both did a good job. While we were playing, he ran by me to fetch a wild ball. On his way back, without a word, he came over and gave me a huge hug. He then continued on his way. That was a monumental moment. As a Mom, for what more could I ask?
Quite regularly, I remind myself to focus on what I did, rather than on what’s left for me to do. I read recently (not recalling where) that what counts is progress, not perfection.
Remember to marvel at the moments.
Saturday, April 10, 2010
Daily dose of mind murmurs
Lists work only if you look at them.
Organization systems are optimal only if you use/follow them.
Life is more fun when it is shared and you take risks.
Above all else, be true to yourself.
Organization systems are optimal only if you use/follow them.
Life is more fun when it is shared and you take risks.
Above all else, be true to yourself.
Friday, April 9, 2010
Weekly wanderings
This has been an emotional week -- the highs and lows have been too great. Thankfully, I have been able to reel myself in to avoid going too low. I am not sure what is going on, but I am glad to be able to recognize that an issue exists. I was so busy with work and my Son, but I was able to fit me. My running and raising money adventure is progressing perfectly. I have 51 supporters, and I have raised $2,241.00 for CCFA. I am running faster; this week's training included 2 file mile runs with a 10 minute mile pace. I need to focus on the positive, and forget the negative, which is not worth nurturing.
Wednesday, April 7, 2010
Monthly monitor - March
March was marvelous. I exercised 24 of the 31 days. I am so on target with my running and raising money adventure. I ran a fabulous 5K.
My training is going well. I am following my trainer’s schedule almost perfectly. A great joy was my fun and successful 5K. My time was 28:28.9, or a 9:11/mile pace. That was so much faster than I had imagined. I was hoping for a 9.5/mile pace. I was strong from start to finish.
My fundraising moved forward. It's interesting to see who ends up donating. I am glad that I reached out because I ended up getting donations from some whom I did not expect.
Dave, Connor, and I had a date -- we saw 101 Dalmatians the musical. At one point, Connor commented that they were singing a lot. He said that he "kinda" liked it. However, he was so attentive. I want to introduce my son to as much as possible. Going to the theater is something with which Connor should be familiar.
My remaking is all that I had hoped -- I am feeling so much better about myself, and I am less stressed. I am being productive, while doing much more than before. It's amazing how the same 24 hours can be used so differently. I am balancing my needs and wants, and moving forward with action items with an open mind.
March leaves me with thoughts of the following Joan Benoit Samuelson words, "Love yourself, for who and what you are; protect your dream and develop your talent to the fullest extent."
Reading has happily filled more and more hours. The list is long and diverse, including an old friend who has found his way back into my mind -- the poet Robert Frost. So many of his poems mean so much to me. Presently, I am thinking about Into My Own, and how nicely it fits into my remaking. That poem ends,
"They would not find me changed from him they knew --
Only more sure of all I thought was true."
My training is going well. I am following my trainer’s schedule almost perfectly. A great joy was my fun and successful 5K. My time was 28:28.9, or a 9:11/mile pace. That was so much faster than I had imagined. I was hoping for a 9.5/mile pace. I was strong from start to finish.
My fundraising moved forward. It's interesting to see who ends up donating. I am glad that I reached out because I ended up getting donations from some whom I did not expect.
Dave, Connor, and I had a date -- we saw 101 Dalmatians the musical. At one point, Connor commented that they were singing a lot. He said that he "kinda" liked it. However, he was so attentive. I want to introduce my son to as much as possible. Going to the theater is something with which Connor should be familiar.
My remaking is all that I had hoped -- I am feeling so much better about myself, and I am less stressed. I am being productive, while doing much more than before. It's amazing how the same 24 hours can be used so differently. I am balancing my needs and wants, and moving forward with action items with an open mind.
March leaves me with thoughts of the following Joan Benoit Samuelson words, "Love yourself, for who and what you are; protect your dream and develop your talent to the fullest extent."
Reading has happily filled more and more hours. The list is long and diverse, including an old friend who has found his way back into my mind -- the poet Robert Frost. So many of his poems mean so much to me. Presently, I am thinking about Into My Own, and how nicely it fits into my remaking. That poem ends,
"They would not find me changed from him they knew --
Only more sure of all I thought was true."
Thursday, March 25, 2010
Daily dose of mind murmurs
I recently read somewhere that nothing tastes as good as skinny feels. How true is that?
My life is not perfect, but I certainly do have perfect moments. I don't think that I need more than that.
My life is not perfect, but I certainly do have perfect moments. I don't think that I need more than that.
Tuesday, March 23, 2010
Tuesday, March 16, 2010
Remaking Resolve
Today was an excellent test of my resolve to remake. I passed! It was a busy day. It was a long day. It was a productive day. In the end, I did what I had to do at work and at home, and I fit me in. I lived in every moment, the best of which was reading a book with my Son.
My day started at 3:45 this morning. After doing all that needed to be done, it was after 8:00. I was scheduled to run 4 miles, which I had not fit in. I decided that I would go to the gym, and just do something. Anything was better than nothing. At the gym, I lived in the moment, and had a wonderful workout! I decided that I would try my hills program. With it, I would have some incline, even if I did not complete the intended distance. In the end, I ran the full 4 miles on my schedule, with a more successful hills program than I have done thus far.
The success of my workout was sweetened by the fact that it almost didn’t happen. I am so glad that I fit me in! Doing so reinforces my resolve to remake myself through running! I am revelling in my remaking.
My day started at 3:45 this morning. After doing all that needed to be done, it was after 8:00. I was scheduled to run 4 miles, which I had not fit in. I decided that I would go to the gym, and just do something. Anything was better than nothing. At the gym, I lived in the moment, and had a wonderful workout! I decided that I would try my hills program. With it, I would have some incline, even if I did not complete the intended distance. In the end, I ran the full 4 miles on my schedule, with a more successful hills program than I have done thus far.
The success of my workout was sweetened by the fact that it almost didn’t happen. I am so glad that I fit me in! Doing so reinforces my resolve to remake myself through running! I am revelling in my remaking.
Friday, March 5, 2010
Monthly monitor - February
February was a busy month. I did so much, and was pretty productive. I exercised 21 of the 28 days. I made fundraising progress, and enjoyed time with my family.
I met, and had a session, with my trainer. She gave me a super schedule. I am following the running portion almost exactly and without much difficulty. I am having a harder time with the strength training. I have been very sporadic following the program, both how often I did it and how much of it I did. As I now have the running settled, March’s focus will be on strength training. I am scheduled to do it 3 times/week. Once I am familiar with the program, I should be able to complete it in about 45 minutes. I am thinking of doing it in the morning before my son wakes up, or right after he gets on the bus. Then, that portion of my training will be done. Also, the eating/drinking before is less critical than with the running. Accordingly, and because I have been fitting in runs later in the day, the strength training might work first thing in the morning.
In addition to my training, this adventure includes a fundraising component, which is off to a great start. I have raised $800.00 thus far, 38% of my $2,100.00 goal. I have 15 donations to date. I have directly reached out to about 80 people by mail, email, and hand. I also have joined Facebook to reach a broader group. My posts in February were less than in January partially because I was reconnecting on Facebook, and gathering support for my adventure. My action items changed a bit, but they still fit nicely into my remaking goal.
Just as I had hoped, the fundraising portion of my adventure nicely is advancing my remaking because I feel like I am making a difference -- for me, my family, and others. My stories would fill a book already. My favorite, however, concerns my son. One night at the dinner table, I was reporting my fundraising success. My son asked how much I needed to get, and then the discussion moved to another topic. Later that evening, my son was counting his money. I mentioned that he should think about what he wants to do with it. He said that he wanted to give some to me for my running. I read from my website, and showed him that I had $790.00. He told me that he wanted to give me $10.00 to make $800.00. He also said that he was going to give me $5.00, but decided on $10.00 when I read about the camp that kids could go to. He went to his room, returning with his donation. I am so proud of my son! Perhaps I am creating what will be a wonderful man who thinks of more than just himself.
We followed the Olympics quite closely. I liked that we talked about athletics, and appreciated the geography and math lessons woven into the Olympics from learning about the many countries to making various calculations connected to the medals, e.g., how many the US had, and how many more or less other countries had. One day my son went to the bus stop as if he were a speed skater, bending down with his hands behind his back, and with his legs moving from side to side. We had fun matching flags to their countries, and then finding them on the globe.
I have 2 quotes to close February. I had decided on one, but then I received my quote of the day email from Runner’s World, and could not resist. It is by the Olympic speed skater Apolo Ohno, and is, “I do my best when I’m running. I don’t know why that is – everything seems to flow so easily. It’s almost a spiritual thing for me.” Those are wonderful words.
The other quote is by Noel Coward, English playwright, composer, and actor:
“Running is the classical road to self-consciousness, self-awareness and self-reliance. Independence is the outstanding characteristic of a runner. He learns the harsh reality of his physical and spiritual limitations when he runs. He learns that personal commitment, sacrifice and determination are his only means to betterment. Runners get promoted only through self-conquest.”
I met, and had a session, with my trainer. She gave me a super schedule. I am following the running portion almost exactly and without much difficulty. I am having a harder time with the strength training. I have been very sporadic following the program, both how often I did it and how much of it I did. As I now have the running settled, March’s focus will be on strength training. I am scheduled to do it 3 times/week. Once I am familiar with the program, I should be able to complete it in about 45 minutes. I am thinking of doing it in the morning before my son wakes up, or right after he gets on the bus. Then, that portion of my training will be done. Also, the eating/drinking before is less critical than with the running. Accordingly, and because I have been fitting in runs later in the day, the strength training might work first thing in the morning.
In addition to my training, this adventure includes a fundraising component, which is off to a great start. I have raised $800.00 thus far, 38% of my $2,100.00 goal. I have 15 donations to date. I have directly reached out to about 80 people by mail, email, and hand. I also have joined Facebook to reach a broader group. My posts in February were less than in January partially because I was reconnecting on Facebook, and gathering support for my adventure. My action items changed a bit, but they still fit nicely into my remaking goal.
Just as I had hoped, the fundraising portion of my adventure nicely is advancing my remaking because I feel like I am making a difference -- for me, my family, and others. My stories would fill a book already. My favorite, however, concerns my son. One night at the dinner table, I was reporting my fundraising success. My son asked how much I needed to get, and then the discussion moved to another topic. Later that evening, my son was counting his money. I mentioned that he should think about what he wants to do with it. He said that he wanted to give some to me for my running. I read from my website, and showed him that I had $790.00. He told me that he wanted to give me $10.00 to make $800.00. He also said that he was going to give me $5.00, but decided on $10.00 when I read about the camp that kids could go to. He went to his room, returning with his donation. I am so proud of my son! Perhaps I am creating what will be a wonderful man who thinks of more than just himself.
We followed the Olympics quite closely. I liked that we talked about athletics, and appreciated the geography and math lessons woven into the Olympics from learning about the many countries to making various calculations connected to the medals, e.g., how many the US had, and how many more or less other countries had. One day my son went to the bus stop as if he were a speed skater, bending down with his hands behind his back, and with his legs moving from side to side. We had fun matching flags to their countries, and then finding them on the globe.
I have 2 quotes to close February. I had decided on one, but then I received my quote of the day email from Runner’s World, and could not resist. It is by the Olympic speed skater Apolo Ohno, and is, “I do my best when I’m running. I don’t know why that is – everything seems to flow so easily. It’s almost a spiritual thing for me.” Those are wonderful words.
The other quote is by Noel Coward, English playwright, composer, and actor:
“Running is the classical road to self-consciousness, self-awareness and self-reliance. Independence is the outstanding characteristic of a runner. He learns the harsh reality of his physical and spiritual limitations when he runs. He learns that personal commitment, sacrifice and determination are his only means to betterment. Runners get promoted only through self-conquest.”
Thursday, February 11, 2010
Helen's Happenings - Team Challenge
This past week has been quite busy. My pending posts are going to have to wait. I am formulating my fundraising plan, as I have joined Team Challenge! The link is:
http://www.active.com/donate/boston10newengland/Boston10HWalsh
http://www.active.com/donate/boston10newengland/Boston10HWalsh
Thursday, February 4, 2010
Enjoying eBay / selling as hemwcollects
In February, 2007, I registered on eBay. However, I didn’t list my first item until about one year later in January of 2008, having been paralyzed by my perfectionism. I felt that I only could list an item with the perfect pictures, the perfect description, the perfect shipping and handling, and the perfect price. Thankfully, working my priorities and action items put an end to my stagnation. Most significantly, I decided that I simply would do my best in offering my collection. At that point it was more important just to act.
Pushing me to act were two goals. I wanted more money, as it was tight. I also wanted to sort my stuff. The smallness of my house was increasing with the growth of my Son and his stuff. These goals needed to fit within my passion for collecting stuff. I reconciled my collecting passion with my recognition that I don’t need to collect everything.
I have sold all kinds of stuff on eBay. I love vintage collectibles, as they often include historical elements. Particularly, ephemera and avdvertising items are filled with fun. My collection included stuff from my Mom’s house. I was managing collectibles left from when she downsized. Sorting through them was so much fun! I also enjoyed getting those collectibles to people who would appreciate them. Watching the auction action provided such satisfaction, as did the significant amount at which so many of my auctions closed.
A few times, I purchased for resale. I bought some items at a store closing sale, knowing there was a market for them. I made a bit of profit on those items, but did not have the most fun with them. It’s not my preference to deal in mainstream items. Also, at least for now, it doesn’t fall properly into my list of priorities. The benefits do not outweigh the burdens. I also purchased a few items at neighborhood yard sales. I found some fun vintage items, on which I made a bit of profit. This approach was fun, but not something that I want to do regularly. For now, at least, purchasing items for resale will have to wait.
I sold some items for family and friends. The circumstances varied tremendously, as did the fun I had. Primarily, I enjoyed showing others that they could get rid of stuff, and make money to get more stuff. I sold my brother-in-law’s train set. I knew that I could spend time researching each piece. I also knew that the market would drive the auctions. I decided to present the items as best I could, and answer questions as necessary. I sold the set in over ten listings, and ended up delivering a pretty good amount of money to my brother-in-law. I had a similar result with a friend for whom I sold some stuff that belonged to his deceased wife, significantly the Barbie collection that did not interest his two young boys. My eBay stories could fill another book about which I dream. It might be entitled: Sorting Stuff, sharing and selling your collectibles.
While I love eBaying, it is time consuming for me. Currently, my time must be focused elsewhere because the benefits do not outweigh the burdens. The goals with which I began selling on eBay were met. At some point, I started to feel like eBaying was a job, but I already have a job, the demands of which are greater now than when I began selling on eBay.
I will continue to eBay; it’s something that I want to keep on my list. For now, it must fall lower on the list. I am thinking about how to include eBay in my Team Challenge fundraising efforts. I have to decide whether the benefits will outweigh the burdens. Time will tell.
Pushing me to act were two goals. I wanted more money, as it was tight. I also wanted to sort my stuff. The smallness of my house was increasing with the growth of my Son and his stuff. These goals needed to fit within my passion for collecting stuff. I reconciled my collecting passion with my recognition that I don’t need to collect everything.
I have sold all kinds of stuff on eBay. I love vintage collectibles, as they often include historical elements. Particularly, ephemera and avdvertising items are filled with fun. My collection included stuff from my Mom’s house. I was managing collectibles left from when she downsized. Sorting through them was so much fun! I also enjoyed getting those collectibles to people who would appreciate them. Watching the auction action provided such satisfaction, as did the significant amount at which so many of my auctions closed.
A few times, I purchased for resale. I bought some items at a store closing sale, knowing there was a market for them. I made a bit of profit on those items, but did not have the most fun with them. It’s not my preference to deal in mainstream items. Also, at least for now, it doesn’t fall properly into my list of priorities. The benefits do not outweigh the burdens. I also purchased a few items at neighborhood yard sales. I found some fun vintage items, on which I made a bit of profit. This approach was fun, but not something that I want to do regularly. For now, at least, purchasing items for resale will have to wait.
I sold some items for family and friends. The circumstances varied tremendously, as did the fun I had. Primarily, I enjoyed showing others that they could get rid of stuff, and make money to get more stuff. I sold my brother-in-law’s train set. I knew that I could spend time researching each piece. I also knew that the market would drive the auctions. I decided to present the items as best I could, and answer questions as necessary. I sold the set in over ten listings, and ended up delivering a pretty good amount of money to my brother-in-law. I had a similar result with a friend for whom I sold some stuff that belonged to his deceased wife, significantly the Barbie collection that did not interest his two young boys. My eBay stories could fill another book about which I dream. It might be entitled: Sorting Stuff, sharing and selling your collectibles.
While I love eBaying, it is time consuming for me. Currently, my time must be focused elsewhere because the benefits do not outweigh the burdens. The goals with which I began selling on eBay were met. At some point, I started to feel like eBaying was a job, but I already have a job, the demands of which are greater now than when I began selling on eBay.
I will continue to eBay; it’s something that I want to keep on my list. For now, it must fall lower on the list. I am thinking about how to include eBay in my Team Challenge fundraising efforts. I have to decide whether the benefits will outweigh the burdens. Time will tell.
Monday, February 1, 2010
Monthly monitor - January
January was a productive month. More could have been done, but that always is the case. I exercised 22 of the 31 days. That’s important. I got a bit more organized, and set a schedule. I turned 46 years old.
I fit me in, with no negative impact on my job and family. I simply was more efficient. I had more positive energy, which I only can attribute to my increased running. The omnipresent question arises – which came first…. Here, is it the energy, the focus, the exercise, or simply the decided determination? This is not the time to try to answer / analyze this question, but instead to take credit for the advances, and to move on.
During January, I started a few things, and made a general plan. I succeeded somewhat in taking time and focusing first. Difficulties certainly were present, but I will not focus on them. I feel that there’s a tendency to dwell on distractions, which can be an excuse for not moving forward. Instead, I will focus on the advances.
I touched base, and made a February appointment with, the trainer that helped me with my marathon. I am so excited about that piece of the puzzle. I also have a new motivational song – Right Now by Van Halen. Thanks to iTunes, I was able to identify and download this song that I happened to hear. How fun!
I set a schedule of races! I will run: a 5K in March; a 10K in April; and a half marathon in June. The half marathon now is the ultimate goal for this remaking. Upon its completion, I will be healthier, and I will have made a difference. The inevitable results of the necessary training will be weight loss and increased fitness. I intend to run the race as part of Team Challenge, raising funds for CCFA, The Crohn’s and Colitis Foundation of America. I signed up for a Team Challenge introductory meeting to be held next week.
I will close January with the following words of Henry W. Longfellow:
Let us, then, be up and doing
With a heart for any fate;
Still achieving, still pursuing,
Learn to labor and to wait.
I fit me in, with no negative impact on my job and family. I simply was more efficient. I had more positive energy, which I only can attribute to my increased running. The omnipresent question arises – which came first…. Here, is it the energy, the focus, the exercise, or simply the decided determination? This is not the time to try to answer / analyze this question, but instead to take credit for the advances, and to move on.
During January, I started a few things, and made a general plan. I succeeded somewhat in taking time and focusing first. Difficulties certainly were present, but I will not focus on them. I feel that there’s a tendency to dwell on distractions, which can be an excuse for not moving forward. Instead, I will focus on the advances.
I touched base, and made a February appointment with, the trainer that helped me with my marathon. I am so excited about that piece of the puzzle. I also have a new motivational song – Right Now by Van Halen. Thanks to iTunes, I was able to identify and download this song that I happened to hear. How fun!
I set a schedule of races! I will run: a 5K in March; a 10K in April; and a half marathon in June. The half marathon now is the ultimate goal for this remaking. Upon its completion, I will be healthier, and I will have made a difference. The inevitable results of the necessary training will be weight loss and increased fitness. I intend to run the race as part of Team Challenge, raising funds for CCFA, The Crohn’s and Colitis Foundation of America. I signed up for a Team Challenge introductory meeting to be held next week.
I will close January with the following words of Henry W. Longfellow:
Let us, then, be up and doing
With a heart for any fate;
Still achieving, still pursuing,
Learn to labor and to wait.
Monday, January 25, 2010
Vice voiding
Voiding what has been a vice is critical to this remaking. While I never considered myself to be a cigarette smoker, I did smoke cigarettes.
I joked that it was my vice – I had to have one. I couldn't be all good. It was something I did sometimes. Unlike many, I did not smoke in certain social situations. Most often, I smoked alone – it was “my thing.”
Smoking was not something I did regularly. It was, however, in my arsenal. Regrettably, it became a fix. Though I know that it did not fix anything, it did provide some sick pleasure for me.
Last year, I decided that I needed more time, money, and health. I would get a little bit of each by not smoking cigarettes.
On March 1st, my husband caught me smoking. He freaked out. More significant, however, was when my then five-year-old son said “what’s the problem, she does it all the time.” I never smoked in front of my son, or so I thought. So much can be written about that day (as well as ones before and after), but just getting a bit of it in writing is enough for now. After that day, as I had been doing, I did not smoke much. Deep down, however, I still clung to my vice as a grape clings to a vine.
Finally, on Friday, June 12, 2009, I smoked what I know in my heart must be my last cigarette. I do so terribly miss this vice, but I know it is for the best. I certainly do have a bit more time, money, and health.
In the past, cigarettes certainly were not always part of my life. However, too often they were something I fell back on. Most of my stories do not include cigarettes, but too many do. Significantly, I remember walking alone in the Public Garden at about 6:30 on the morning I was to run the Boston Marathon. I smoked a cigarette before proceeding to the lavish Ritz Carlton breakfast offered to the Judge Baker Children’s Center team, of which I was a member. Afterward, I successfully completed what I call My Marathon in 4:25:19.
It now has been more than 7 months since I smoked what I vow to have been my last cigarette. I certainly have avoided this vice for longer periods of time in the past. While it was avoided, I must admit to myself that it was never voided. Until now.
I joked that it was my vice – I had to have one. I couldn't be all good. It was something I did sometimes. Unlike many, I did not smoke in certain social situations. Most often, I smoked alone – it was “my thing.”
Smoking was not something I did regularly. It was, however, in my arsenal. Regrettably, it became a fix. Though I know that it did not fix anything, it did provide some sick pleasure for me.
Last year, I decided that I needed more time, money, and health. I would get a little bit of each by not smoking cigarettes.
On March 1st, my husband caught me smoking. He freaked out. More significant, however, was when my then five-year-old son said “what’s the problem, she does it all the time.” I never smoked in front of my son, or so I thought. So much can be written about that day (as well as ones before and after), but just getting a bit of it in writing is enough for now. After that day, as I had been doing, I did not smoke much. Deep down, however, I still clung to my vice as a grape clings to a vine.
Finally, on Friday, June 12, 2009, I smoked what I know in my heart must be my last cigarette. I do so terribly miss this vice, but I know it is for the best. I certainly do have a bit more time, money, and health.
In the past, cigarettes certainly were not always part of my life. However, too often they were something I fell back on. Most of my stories do not include cigarettes, but too many do. Significantly, I remember walking alone in the Public Garden at about 6:30 on the morning I was to run the Boston Marathon. I smoked a cigarette before proceeding to the lavish Ritz Carlton breakfast offered to the Judge Baker Children’s Center team, of which I was a member. Afterward, I successfully completed what I call My Marathon in 4:25:19.
It now has been more than 7 months since I smoked what I vow to have been my last cigarette. I certainly have avoided this vice for longer periods of time in the past. While it was avoided, I must admit to myself that it was never voided. Until now.
Thursday, January 21, 2010
What works?
In the end, I have to do what works for me. Way too much information exists about success, happiness, and being healthy. Bits and pieces might be helpful, but the precise mechanics must work within my ability, schedule, and comfort level.
Deciding on what works requires prioritizing -- what I need to do, what I want to do, and what I should do. For me, prioritizing also includes the opposite -- what I do NOT need to do, what I do NOT want to do, and what I should NOT do. Three things on each list are sufficient; spending too much time making the lists, rather than working them, is not productive. The lists can and should change / be modified on a regular basis. They are meant to provide a frame of reference and reminders as my remaking proceeds.
Effective action items are those that advance my needs and wants. Running is a perfect action item for obvious reasons. Another action item is cooking dinner. The benefits to my family, health, and wallet are significant. It’s also fun. Finally, I can satisfy my desires to be creative (deciding what to prepare and how to present it) and to learn (finding and following recipes).
Thoughts about me at the start and at the finish also will help. Keeping in mind that I can’t control / change the world and others is critical. Similarly critical is acknowledging that: I do control my thoughts, actions, and words; and I can change my attitude.
What I need to do:
1. Work at my job
2. Care for my son
3. Take care of myself
What I want to do:
1. Be fit
2. Enjoy my family
3. Make a difference
What I should do:
1. Reach out to others
2. Appreciate what I have
3. Give myself credit
What I do NOT need to do:
1. Be the perfect Mom
2. Weigh 115 pounds again
3. Have an exquisitely decorated 3000 square foot house
What I do NOT want to do:
1. Yell too much
2. Waste time
3. Worry about what is expected
What I should NOT do:
1. Obsess over money
2. Have too many projects going at once
3. Smoke
Thoughts of the Start and Finish:
Start -- I am an educated working woman in her mid-forties. I am a mom and wife. I am the eighth child in a traditionally Irish Catholic family from Boston. I am an attorney. I have a job. I am over 7 years into my second marriage. I own my home with a mortgage that is not more than my house is worth. I have some retirement savings. I am healthy, and weigh about 138 pounds. I guess I am part of the average middle class. I have issues. I can be a loud-mouthed control freak who wants everyone’s approval. I am a dreamer and a perfectionist. I want it all, but have yet to define the word all in the context of me.
Finish -- I know that I can finish particular tasks, including a race when I cross the finish line. Finishing does not, however, translate to my life – I never will be finished making me. That’s an exciting, and sometimes daunting thought. Characterizing this time as a remaking feels reasonably realistic. For now, I guess I will artificially and crudely define the finish as when I weigh about 123 pounds. Though extremely superficial, I know that I can reach this finish only by taking so many positive steps that will not be superficial.
Sometimes I feel guilty about wanting more because I already have so much. However, it’s really not wanting more, but instead doing more with what I have and striving to be the best that I can be.
Deciding on what works requires prioritizing -- what I need to do, what I want to do, and what I should do. For me, prioritizing also includes the opposite -- what I do NOT need to do, what I do NOT want to do, and what I should NOT do. Three things on each list are sufficient; spending too much time making the lists, rather than working them, is not productive. The lists can and should change / be modified on a regular basis. They are meant to provide a frame of reference and reminders as my remaking proceeds.
Effective action items are those that advance my needs and wants. Running is a perfect action item for obvious reasons. Another action item is cooking dinner. The benefits to my family, health, and wallet are significant. It’s also fun. Finally, I can satisfy my desires to be creative (deciding what to prepare and how to present it) and to learn (finding and following recipes).
Thoughts about me at the start and at the finish also will help. Keeping in mind that I can’t control / change the world and others is critical. Similarly critical is acknowledging that: I do control my thoughts, actions, and words; and I can change my attitude.
What I need to do:
1. Work at my job
2. Care for my son
3. Take care of myself
What I want to do:
1. Be fit
2. Enjoy my family
3. Make a difference
What I should do:
1. Reach out to others
2. Appreciate what I have
3. Give myself credit
What I do NOT need to do:
1. Be the perfect Mom
2. Weigh 115 pounds again
3. Have an exquisitely decorated 3000 square foot house
What I do NOT want to do:
1. Yell too much
2. Waste time
3. Worry about what is expected
What I should NOT do:
1. Obsess over money
2. Have too many projects going at once
3. Smoke
Thoughts of the Start and Finish:
Start -- I am an educated working woman in her mid-forties. I am a mom and wife. I am the eighth child in a traditionally Irish Catholic family from Boston. I am an attorney. I have a job. I am over 7 years into my second marriage. I own my home with a mortgage that is not more than my house is worth. I have some retirement savings. I am healthy, and weigh about 138 pounds. I guess I am part of the average middle class. I have issues. I can be a loud-mouthed control freak who wants everyone’s approval. I am a dreamer and a perfectionist. I want it all, but have yet to define the word all in the context of me.
Finish -- I know that I can finish particular tasks, including a race when I cross the finish line. Finishing does not, however, translate to my life – I never will be finished making me. That’s an exciting, and sometimes daunting thought. Characterizing this time as a remaking feels reasonably realistic. For now, I guess I will artificially and crudely define the finish as when I weigh about 123 pounds. Though extremely superficial, I know that I can reach this finish only by taking so many positive steps that will not be superficial.
Sometimes I feel guilty about wanting more because I already have so much. However, it’s really not wanting more, but instead doing more with what I have and striving to be the best that I can be.
Monday, January 18, 2010
Why wait?
I have been planning to remake myself, thinking about what form the process and I would take. During 2009, I took what I now view as steps. They were not enough. Things are going well, but I want more. This remaking will include changes to by body, mind, and spirit. I will get more fit. I will learn something new each day. I will use a positive attitude to help others.
The 2009 steps included running, but too sporadically. I ran 4 races: a 5K in March; a 10K in April; a 5K in June; and the 7.1 mile Falmouth Road race in August. Toward the end of the year, I was trying to get into a routine. It did not work too well. In November, I had my annual physical exam. I gained 8 pounds since my prior annual. They are not too much in and of themselves. However, I don’t want to make such a weight gain an annual occurrence.
I have been working at my job so many hours. Generally, it’s okay because I like what I am doing and I have enough flexibility still to spend time with my Son, who turned 6 at the end of December. I am getting quite a bit of satisfaction from my job. I am learning, but want to learn more outside my job, simply for the sake of learning.
My life has been too secluded. I have tried to reach out to others with varied success. Helping others always has been important to me. I have resolved myself, for now, to helping my Son and my 89 year old Mother. I also have to help myself because when I do I am a better woman, mother, daughter, wife, and employee.
During a recent conversation with a health care professional, I had a real awakening. I explained that life gets in the way of my running. Then, I realized that running is part of my life, and has to be fit in. Fitting me in is critical.
Several weeks ago, a neighbor mentioned running a half marathon to raise money for a charitable foundation. Wow, that would be perfect for me, and just what I need as a structure for my remaking. It will happen. I am ready. Currently, I am laying a foundation. Most importantly, I am getting into an exercise routine. There is no reason to wait. It is time to remake!
The 2009 steps included running, but too sporadically. I ran 4 races: a 5K in March; a 10K in April; a 5K in June; and the 7.1 mile Falmouth Road race in August. Toward the end of the year, I was trying to get into a routine. It did not work too well. In November, I had my annual physical exam. I gained 8 pounds since my prior annual. They are not too much in and of themselves. However, I don’t want to make such a weight gain an annual occurrence.
I have been working at my job so many hours. Generally, it’s okay because I like what I am doing and I have enough flexibility still to spend time with my Son, who turned 6 at the end of December. I am getting quite a bit of satisfaction from my job. I am learning, but want to learn more outside my job, simply for the sake of learning.
My life has been too secluded. I have tried to reach out to others with varied success. Helping others always has been important to me. I have resolved myself, for now, to helping my Son and my 89 year old Mother. I also have to help myself because when I do I am a better woman, mother, daughter, wife, and employee.
During a recent conversation with a health care professional, I had a real awakening. I explained that life gets in the way of my running. Then, I realized that running is part of my life, and has to be fit in. Fitting me in is critical.
Several weeks ago, a neighbor mentioned running a half marathon to raise money for a charitable foundation. Wow, that would be perfect for me, and just what I need as a structure for my remaking. It will happen. I am ready. Currently, I am laying a foundation. Most importantly, I am getting into an exercise routine. There is no reason to wait. It is time to remake!
Tuesday, January 12, 2010
Newly named
My mind and heart are racing with the endless possibilities available to me. So much will be recorded. I wanted to include MORGANizer in the title, but that is my global signature, and, therefore, included in the tag line.
The main title evidences my current focus, again remaking myself. In the past, remaking myself has included running. The number 2 represents my son and me, the 2 that matter the most. I only can control myself -- my thoughts, actions, and words. I need to care for my son, who just turned 6.
Keeping the 2 in check will only benefit the rest of my life -- my work, my husband, and my family. Talking about that list will have to wait until later.
The main title evidences my current focus, again remaking myself. In the past, remaking myself has included running. The number 2 represents my son and me, the 2 that matter the most. I only can control myself -- my thoughts, actions, and words. I need to care for my son, who just turned 6.
Keeping the 2 in check will only benefit the rest of my life -- my work, my husband, and my family. Talking about that list will have to wait until later.
Simply start
This is my first posting. I have created this to track yet another of my remakings. Gratefully, I embark on this journey. It is one of many that I have taken.
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